Too many cookies spoil the cook...

I put on 3.5lb this week, so now am 0.5lb off the heaviest I've been this year.

That's a big number, but is easily explained when you see just a sample of my intake for the week:

• Chinese takeaway
• Indian takeaway
• pizza
• cakes
• cookies
• alcohol
• shortbread
• sandwiches

I keep telling myself that I keep going along to weigh in because it helps me to keep track of where I am even if I have put on - that it keeps me in control. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm kidding myself and would be in the same position if I didn't get weighed every week, but feeling a bit less guilty because I wouldn't be quantifying it.

I decided not to stay to group tonight because I felt that had I done so I would've become emotional and taken the time and attention from those who deserve the support.

When I started this journey over a year ago, my aim was to lose weight for my wedding. Now my aim is just to lose weight - for nobody other than myself. I think that might be the problem. I know that losing weight would be good for my health and general well being, but since I'm loved by a wonderful woman I no longer need to lose weight for my self esteem or confidence.

Do I still want to lose weight? Yes
Do I have the tools and support I need to lose weight? Absolutely!
Will my love of food get in the way? Most likely

This week I was told of a detox diet where the least weight anyone had lost in a week was 11lb. As tempting as that is, I know that it wouldn't work for me in the long term. For me to be successful in losing weight and keeping it off I need to permanently change the way I eat. When I was really into SW last year the weight dropped off and stayed off. Now that I'm on and off plan my weight is fluctuating a lot, but I am still lighter than I was when I started this journey, so something has stuck.

I'm off on holiday in just over 4 weeks, so maybe that gives me something to go for. To get back to 1.5 stone off I need to lose 4lb. To get back to my lowest weight this year I need to lose 8.5lb. To get back to 2 stone off I need to lose 11lb. I reckon (hope??) at least one of those is achievable. Wish me luck!

As I mentioned in my last post I'm no longer on Facebook. I hope that doesn't stop my friends from group in offering their support or asking for mine - together we can all get to where we want to, and I will be staying to group next week.

On the subject of friends, that reminds me - I've not had any responses to my previous post. Please, please, please comment and offer your suggestions - I could really use all the inspiration you can offer at the moment.